How lucky I was to get to know and love Sylvia! I was in my late 20’s when we met. We taught together in an elementary school and
became family quickly in spite of, or maybe because of, our 23 year age difference. I was in my late 20’s and Sylvia her young 50’s. While recovering from my divorce, Sylvia became my best friend, my mother, my sister, my cheerleader and my travel partner. Sylvia’s husband Cliff became my dear, dear friend and partner in crime.
Feeling the need to re-create my life in 1990, I moved closer to my family but my relationship with Sylvia was stronger than ever. She and Cliff drove across the country to help me renovate my new home. What a great month filled with laughter and very little sleep. We made opportunities several times a year to travel together or spend extended time together at each other’s homes. My mantra was “Friends are Chosen Family” and somehow Sylvia and Cliff felt closer than the family I was born into.
Thanksgivings, Sylvia flew my direction and we cooked Thanksgiving dinner together for approximately 25 friends and family members. I was the cook and she was my sous chef. We enjoyed this tradition together for several years, and it became one of my favorite times of the year. It was a guaranteed time to surround myself in the love and companionship of my dear friend. As Sylvia got older, her role at Thanksgiving became more that of chief dishwasher or companion as I resumed the preparation and cooking. But it was all good!
December, 2009 Cliff died unexpectedly from a heart attack. Having been married for 45 years, Sylvia was thrust into widowhood, of which she was not prepared and not wanting to embrace. Our roles quickly shifted and I became her teacher (how to cook, use the internet) and her escape when she just couldn’t stand to be in her home alone anymore.
In November of 2013, Sylvia’s brother was dying of cancer and she knew she needed to stay closer to home for Thanksgiving in case she needed to go be with him. Of course I was crushed but I completely understood. That Thanksgiving morning I woke having had the worst dream ever. In my dream, her sister-in-law Charlotte called me and told me that Sylvia was in the hospital and had an incurable illness and was dying. I couldn’t shake the dread and sadness of that dream throughout our Thanksgiving day. I tried to call Sylvia a couple of times, but I knew that she would be spending the holiday at a relative’s house and I wouldn’t be able to reach her.
The next morning I received a call from her sister-in-law and was told that Sylvia had had a stroke at the Thanksgiving dinner table. She was in the hospital. I immediately flew to be by her side and realized that the stroke was more massive than previously thought. Sylvia was transferred to a nursing home with complete paralysis of the left side of her body. In my devastation and hopelessness, I was also stunned by the fact that I had received the news of Sylvia’s Illness before the stroke happened. I knew that I was truly connected to her, but I did not know this kind of communication was even a possibility.
As she tried to recover from the stroke, we were all saddened and frustrated that Sylvia wasn’t getting better. There was very little improvement, if any. But she never gave up hope. Ever.
Over the course of the next few months I would return to my family and work and then fly out to spend time with Sylvia. I kept getting intuitive information about Sylvia’s health before the doctors would find the issue. I heard that Sylvia was going to get pneumonia. I called her sister and asked for someone to please check Sylvia’s lungs. Two days later I was informed that Sylvia had been diagnosed with pneumonia.
Then Sylvia started having issues with her stomach. She had contracted C diff in the nursing home. Sylvia was placed in the hospital as the nursing home could no longer treat her. C diff is extremely contagious and anyone visiting her had to gown up. I visited Sylvia several extended weekends in the hospital. Her health continued to decline.
After three months of paralysis and illness, I was with Sylvia when her doctor came in and told her that she had been diagnosed with stomach cancer and would not be getting any better. In fact there were no treatments that she could survive that would add to the length of her life. The only thing left to do was try to make her comfortable. After a valiant struggle, Sylvia passed away three weeks after the cancer diagnosis, her niece and I by her side.
I have never had a relationship where I felt such a strong connection. Losing Sylvia physically was devastating. Since her passing three years ago, I have found that my connection to my dear friend still exists. She has come to me many times and I was told just yesterday that Sylvia is connected to my heart chakra with a golden cord. My heart has always known this, and it brings me joy, tears to my eyes and appreciation for a love I never thought I could know.
All this to say, my ability to connect with Sylvia while she was in body across the nation, and later with her after her passing, really made me want to learn more about this spiritual connection and my role in it. I have since devoted my time and energy to wallow in all things energy and have experienced a personal transformation that surprises me and those who know me well. I have learned a lot about my soul purpose for this time in my body.
I have learned that my life to date has been leading up to my future of teaching, healing and soul to soul connection. I invite you to join me through this blog on my journey.
